So I feel like I’ve been keeping a juicy little secret for a long time now, so it’s great to be with you here and let you in on it. After you read what I have to say, feel free to tell anyone and everyone about it because I’m ready to shift from just helping my group of kick ass- high-level clients to helping as many people as possible.
So here’s the deal – I can help literally anyone with absolutely anything. Yep I said it.
No matter what someone defines as the problem, at the heart of the matter is that people want to feel less pain and they want to enjoy their lives more. I get it.
Whether it’s weight loss, anxiety, overindulging in anything, unhappiness, relationships, low energy, career, feeling unattractive, anger, mother-in-laws, wedding planning, wanting a divorce, trying to get back into exercise, wanting more, wanting less, being stuck, feeling confused, toxic friends, the death of a loved one, being in debt, a difficult boss, a mean coworker, getting out of an affair, feeling hopeless or purposeless, dealing with a terminal illness, being told by your doctor that your fine when you know something is definitely wrong, and anything you can think of. I can even help you make a better decision if you’re thinking of getting bangs or a pulling a “Brittney” and cutting off all of your hair.
Bring it on.
Whether your issue is being chronically late, overweight, single, tired, unhappy or ill, I help people learn how to help themselves with an approach that has the power to change how they exist for the rest of their lives. I had to come up with something so that I didn’t need to worry about when my ass was in a rest home-I figured it out and it’s going to be all right.
I solve the problem of figuring out the real problem. Stay with me; it gets a little confusing with all this high-level therapist-speak.
Within my community I’m known as an addiction specialist who became a “celebrity therapist.” But the truth is that what I do helps people at the root of their problem and gives them a way to be their own natural pain killers rather than taking them (it’s so much cheaper after- all when you think about it). So I guess I’m an addiction specialist, but really I’m a “Self Specialist.”
Instead of just treating people’s problems or symptoms like drinking, drugs, food, trauma, anxiety, or relationship issues, I also treat the relationship to the SELF that is the one drinking, smoking, stuffing its face, and doing drive-bys. I like to go direct (I hate layovers-on the way to where I want to go and I know you do too).
I make achieving sanity fun and accessible by making “self- help” about “Self-Leadership” which includes a whole lotta self-lov’n. I like to think I make spirituality sexy-(No I didn’t say sexual so get your mind out of the gutter-I said sexy-meaning-alive-exciting-thrilling-alive-and satisfying). I’m talk’n ’bout an intimate relationship with your-SELF that extends to all that you do and literally produces all that you experience.
I’ve combined my life-long “practice” (emphasis on practice) of leadership in athletics and business, my expertise as a trained-licensed psychologist, and my spiritual strategies– and created my own special focus of “Self-ology” rather than just the “psyche-OLOGY.”
The point of treating the psyche is so that my clients can get on with their “Bad SELF” which really means their best SELF-experience. When it comes down to it we’re talk’n ‘bout mojo aren’t we?
Let’s look at the term “Your- SELF”- Focus for a moment on the word “yourself” as in Your-Self. Like you’ve got A SELF— that you are in charge of. You’ve been appointed to Commander and Chief of population You-Self and so it may be helpful to take office and get down to bid-ness.
What that means is that no matter what problems I’ve ever had, or what problems my clients, friends or family members have ever come to me with it can all be traced to a root level SELF-RELATIONSHIP issue, and for some a SELF-CARE CRISIS. I know everyone has heard the term self-care before, but I’m talking about something different. I’m not just talking about more pedicures and massages… I’m talking about SELF-CARE as healthcare. I believe that is the biggest crisis our nation faces and the biggest obstacle to people’s general wellbeing and enjoyment of life is our national SELF-CARE CRISIS.
I’ve got the solution and my mission is to address the SELF CARE CRISIS with my SELF-LEADERSHIP campaign, so people lead their lives in the real sense of the word.
SELF-LEADERSHIP is about BFF-ing yourself, loving yourself, and ultimately becoming the leader of your life so you can lead yourself through any “problem” you have.
In my own life and in the lives of my clients there would be a level of functionality and success in certain areas of life where one is leading a business or a family, and yet there would be dysfunctionality (clearly I like making up words) in other aspects of life that would make it difficult to enjoy life overall.
Much like my clients, in my life I was someone who had bought and sold millions of dollars of real-estate and had managed hundreds of people by my mid thirties; and still I struggled to make all parts of my life work as well as the parts of my life where I was truly leading. I even had the balls to ask Oprah Winfrey (yes that Oprah-not the other one) for her shoes on national television and she gave them to me. She wears a size up in Jimmy Choos so I offered to take them off her hands and she handed them over.
My clients all have a similar story. They felt like they knew how to be successful and in many areas could make things happen and ask for what they wanted.
But no matter how hard they tried and how much effort they put in they felt unhappy. They felt like they could never solve all of their problems, and even felt out of control in some areas of their lives like with: alcohol, food, relationships, spending, drama and the like. Been there, done that, and if I’m honest-bought way too many T-Shirts.
For many of my clients and myself-leading a SELF through a life of chronic enjoyment takes getting used to, so I’ve incorporated a process that helps people with “Abundance Adjustment Disorder.” Self-Leadership incorporates learning how not to create stimulus in life from struggle rather from outrageous success and enjoyment of life. That’s so much better than maintaining a “struggle set-point” just because it’s familiar and because we wonder if anyone will love us when we’re not struggling.
So much of our experience of love in our life comes through the experience of struggle and so it’s unchartered territory to live an abundant, enjoyable, stable, successful life because we have no idea who the hell will show up to celebrate that. A lot of people have no idea how to love people when they’re doing well; so trust me you can feel great and we’ll get everyone else used to it. It will take some time, but they’ll come around.
Speaking of love, the truth is that a big part of what I do as a therapist and a coach is that I LOVE myself and my clients as my main methodology in leading them to lead themselves towards more enjoyment of their very existence. It may not be PC to say it and I certainly don’t do it in an “icky” way but when it comes down to it I love myself as a way of loving them and they report finally knowing what LOVE LOOKS LIKE. And my brand of love is a big helping of compassionate honesty, mixed with a dose humor to take the sting out, served on a caring platter of “active self loving and leading direction” so that people can actively change the way they exist immediately and see results.
SELF CARE-SELF-LOVE AND SELF -LEADERSHIP is an active strategy for living that can include a lot of things when it comes to helping my clients. Like taking a group of clients Skydiving to overcome anxiety, helping an athlete prepare for a big game, helping a client realize that the party their throwing is a choice and should’ve be experienced like a threat to their survival, or helping a celebrity doctor through a divorce, or putting clients through a “Self-Leadership Boot Camp” for 30 days with a daily to-do list and check in for accountability……. I do whatever it takes to solve problems at the level of the SELF so that people improve their lives permanently and all-encompassingly (yes that’s a new word too)
Sidebar– My dear friend “A” who professor in Smart Ass-ness, English and History gave me permission to make words up because words are meant communicate- so I’m going to keep doing it in our little discussion. In fact, my girl Oprah gave me permission to use the word “impactful” years ago before if was even a word and so for a long time I just say stuff because I like it and eventually Webster’s will catch up.
Ok back to hormonal health- So this root level self-caring/self leadership approach to life that I employ includes physiological wellness. I evaluate clients for root level hormonal issues that may be responsible for low energy, low mood, and apathy. Due to my own lack of self-care years I had extensive hormonal deficiencies in my early thirties and was told my health was “normal” when I was clearly falling apart. I was desperately unwell and didn’t want to exist anymore. No matter how successful my life was I felt terrible and had lost my mojo. After years of advocating for myself I found a practice that discovered an extensive hormonal crisis going on within me and they helped saved my life because there’s no way I would’ve gone on like that. I’ve been self-caring and healthy for years now but this experience changed my life and impacts my work with clients to this day.
I have become a human hormonal detector and can tell when my client’s (or anyone I come in contact with) lack of self-care or hereditary disposition has impacted them on a physiological level that needs to be addressed. A few years ago I began to send my therapy clients for advanced hormonal evaluations that I felt could be impacting their mood and functionality. I was concerned their previously undetected health issues would be obstacles to their optimal living and the success of my psychological treatment.
Truth be told it was a real bummer sitting there day in and day out with someone on a ton of psych meds (that weren’t’ working) experiencing lots of medication side effects and still feeling like they didn’t want to exists Helping people trudge from day to day just surviving wasn’t something I felt good about. I’m a lot of things but I’m not a masochist (well only sometimes) so I wanted to make sure my clients had any physiological issues treated so we could build their life back up from a rock solid foundation.
I can see how so many of my clients who come to me for addiction treatment felt like drinking and for many the root of their addiction and mood issues was a long-term hormonal deficiency and alcohol was one way to cope. The correlation between hormonal deficiencies, mood issues, and addiction issues in my entire therapeutic career is 100%. I’ve not had none client without a Thyroid issues and Adrenal problems; for many a complete lack of Serotonin has been found.
To date I have sent countless people for an extensive hormonal workup and ALL of them have had significant hormonal issues that were the root cause of their mood and energy issues. Now I send every client I have for this evaluation to rule out and/or treat their issues at the deepest physiological root level so that the work we do from a psychological and “self-ological standpoint” isn’t impeded by a hidden problem. I work closely with the medical practice I send people to and I conference in on their appointments so I am well versed on their hormonal treatment and progression. The practice I work with has offices all of the country and I work closely with physicians in each practice office to help my clients in places like New York, Los Angeles, Washington D. C. and Philadelphia.
I am the only psychologist I am aware of (anywhere) that makes hormonal treatment a foundational basis for a psychological practice, and because of this protocol I am changing mental health care starting with my practice. I have to admit that working with clients who feel physically well and want to live than when I had to convince them it was worthwhile. Working with physically healthy people is way more fun and allows me to help people with what I do best-helping them live purposefully, intentionally, authentically, abundantly, humorously, fully, successfully, and well.
Currently I am working with the physician who treated me and now treats all of my clients on a campaign that will help the mental health field have an awareness of the hidden obstacles to optimal psychological wellness. We are also directing our campaign to psychiatrists who as a result of my unique protocol as a psychologist have had to adjust to learning how to treat people psychiatrically. Since clients are being treated a the root level with hormonal replacement they no longer need high levels of psychiatric medications anymore so adjusting to working with my hormonally treated clients who need, well let’s just say “less” or “no more” psych medication as they hormonal health improves is something for medical providers who prescribe psych meds to learn more about. It’s a work in progress that will keep me busy for quite a while……
Overall, I’m excited to be living a life that is it’s most simple, being me and letting that help as many people as possible. I’m following my intuition, letting my entire past (including the pain I’ve experienced and caused myself), my natural personality, all of my training in athletics, business, and psychology drive my brand of self-care as a Self-Leading approach to enjoyment throughout people’s lifespan, and ultimately serve as leadership in healing the national Self-Care Crisis.
I look forward to sharing with you all that I’ve learned and all that I can to improve your lives.